Hello Cartagena… or Not - W.T.F.?!?

Morning came with a thud. Or was that the phone hitting the deck with a nudge after the wakeup call?

 

Whatevah!

 

Groggy morning details completed and THEY were headed to Giovanni’s for breakfast with TE6… with HIS usual “Oooppss” back to cabin for his hoodie [it’s like a fridge in Giovanni’s].

 

Once assembled and coffee poured, comes the ding-dong for the Captains normally cheerful morning greeting and announcements.

Only… it went something like this:

“Good Morning Ladies and Gentleman, {Blah, Blah, Blah}. Now, I am sorry to report that we just now received word from the authorities in Cartagena, that the government now requires us to have Covid Tested every passenger 48 hours before arrival and of course since we are due to arrive in Cartagena in an hour that obviously is impossible.

Therefore… we will sail on to our next port and arrive in Aruba at 5PM tomorrow. 

Today then, will be an unplanned day at sea... Etc. Etc. Etc.”

 

W.T.F.?!?

 

After which Crusin’ Susan, our Ever-Chipper Cruise Director comes on the P.A. to re-iterate the bad news, apologize profusely and advise that all shore excursions will be refunded.

 

OK, so much for stumbling around Cartagena and pitching around the bay on the “Sea Rumba” tour.

 

Since THEIR D-I-L Cristina is Colombian, Chucky and Dragon Chic were looking forward to some taste of the country… Oh Wellllll.

 

Now what to do? 

Oh yeah, Let’s do Beach Day [Poolside] to make up for the spoiled Beach Day when the non-brunch turned into mid-day lunch in Giovanni’s to make up for that little debacle in the Main Dining Room, which in turn cancelled Beach Day.  

Got it? 

Good, now read on.

 

While everyone headed to the pool deck, Chucky attempted to catch up on some NOWAT and was able to knock out, “Mother Earth & Chocolate.

 

All this while the Captain ran the ship around in circles to kill time, dump the waste tanks or whatevah as heading straight to Aruba wouldn’t do since we had no parking spot a day early.

 

Happy Hour got under way as usual with Claudia’s delightful service and where Donna, Ellen and Dragon Chic expressed their excitement about having “Chicken Marsala” for dinner.

 

And you think this is gonna go well, dontcha.

 

Well, “Caesar” as Lenny has taken to calling Gabriel, [why we have no idea] the Assistant Head waiter, DID promise the ladies a delightful deviation from the “Boring” menu, Didn’t he?

 

Once seated at our lovely table, Stefan and Anwar took the orders for Cocktails, Appetizers and Entrée’s as Caesar/Gabriel [hereafter referred to as C/G did his little “Grin & Dance” around the table to show his “attentiveness”.

 

Soooo, when Anwar approached the three ladies for their order, they all piped up:

“Oh we’re having the Chicken Marsala!”

 

Anwar was REALLY confused and turned to C/G, who… with a “deer in the headlights” look, took off on a run, where to, was anybody’s guess. Chucky however deduced that he was headed to some far off kitchen to come up with something he promised but forgot to tell the chef about.

 

Sure enough, a little bit after everyone else’s entrees were served, C/G shows up with three orders of “Chicken Marsala”.

 

That is if… instead of:

Luscious, dainty medallions of pounded, battered and sautéed chicken tenderloin in a delightful Marsala Wine reduction

 

You dare to consider:

Three over cooked and dry “whole” chicken breasts - drummer joint and all - doused in some watery, brown gravy

to be - “Chicken Marsala”.  

 

With a look of total amazement, the ladies tried to cut their three orders of rubber tire masquerading as “Chicken Marsala”, only to look at the “beaming” [not for long] C/G and declare:

“You’re kidding, Right?”

 

To which C/G could only hem & haw and flounder around doing his best to look so hurt that they could question his earnest offering declaring,

“That’s what the chef gave me!”

As he proceeded to deflect the blame for what was obviously his failure to deliver on a promise – which he obviously forgot to handle with the kitchen - by trying to palm off left over chicken from the Windjammer Buffet as Chicken Marsala.

 

To add insult to injury, Chucky's "Gnocchi Bolognaise" instead of being boiled, "Plump Pillows of Yukon Gold potato", turned out to be Pan Fried - inedible marbles.

 

By now, HE and the ladies were DONE, and declined any “Make up” order of WHATEVAH, and elected to wait for desert, hoping that IT would be better.

Needless to say, Lenny and Donna proceeded to hand Mr. "Chicken Marsala" a new,  lower-extremity orifice.

C/G continued to do the “Dance of the Utterly Guilty and Confused Wimp” that he was, while Lenny and the Ladies continued to ream away, until Chucky, as tactfully as he could, advised him to leave the immediate area before it got any uglier.

 

Anwar and Stefan did their best to try to make up for C/G’s ineptitude with Excellent service but by then, even some passable deserts didn’t help. 

 

As TE6 headed to the Casino for after “Chicken Marsala” medicating libations and games of chance, C/G limply trailed after them with one last feeble attempt to deflect any blame for the debacle. 

Chucky, wheeled about, gave C/G "THE HAND" which stopped him dead in his tracks and then turned to follow the others to the Casino.

 

Some Won, Some Didn’t, and tomorrow would be a better day with another Beach Day planned.

 

Since we wouldn’t arrive in Aruba until after 5PM, we had already cancelled dinner with C/G and company.  Instead, S&E had arranged for us to have dinner at their Late Daughter Lesley’s favorite Aruba haunt, the Driftwood, an Aruba Institution with promises that it would DEFINITELY make up for tonight’s C/G Foible.

 

And on that note… We'll catch up with them tomorrow at breakfast in Giovanni’s.

 

Ciao 4 Now

Uncle Chuck & The Not EVEN Happy Wìth C/G, 

Dragon Lady